Become less reactive and more responsive

In life, we have essentially two psychological modes that we are in most of the time: reactive and responsive. The reactive mode is the one that feels stressful. In it, we feel pressured and are quick to judge. We lose perspective and take things personally. We’re annoyed, bothered, and frustrated.

Needless to say, our judgment and decision making capacity is severely impaired when we are in a reactive state of mind. We make quick decisions that we often regret. We annoy other people and tend to bring out the worst in them. When an opportunity knocks, we are usually too overwhelmed or frustrated to see it. If we do see it, we’re usually overly critical and negative.

The responsive mode, on the other hand, is our most relaxed state of mind. Being responsive suggests that we have our bearings. We see the bigger picture and take things less personally. Rather than being rigid and stubborn, we are flexible and calm. In the responsive mode, we are at our best. We bring out the best in others and solve problems gracefully. When an opportunity comes our way, our mind is open. We are receptive to new ideas.

Once you are aware of these two drastically different modes of being. You will begin to notice which one you are in. You’ll also notice the predictability of your behavior and feelings when you are in each mode. You’ll observe yourself being irrational and negative in your reactive mode and calm and wise in your responsive state of mind.